Every individual's mind is his own, developing and evolving through years... each one has an individual perception of what is important and what's trivial to them. What may seem important to one might be humorous to others and so on..
A recent incident just made me write this post... So read on...
I had this monthly routine visit to the beauty parlor for threading my eyebrows. I went along with a friend of mine, who is almost 3 years younger to me. Here, I have to mention her age because that's why am writing this post. The different games your mind plays as you grow older. I am not saying that my friend has been immature or something, but as I see her, she reminds me of myself some 3-4 years ago.
When I was younger, I was this very short-tempered girl, throwing things even on my dad ( if he didnt put up with his promises on my birthday) and walking off to my college if my mom didn't get my favourite dress pressed on time. Everything was a big issue for me. Everything had to be perfect for me. Nothing less would be approved by "My Highness". I used to get irritated even for the slightest crease on my dress. Or more so, I never liked being reminded by Dad that am spending more time on phones rather than with the books. I was the master of myself. That was my attitude.
Today, as I continue to raise my two little sons, constantly being their master for discipline and behavior, some things hardly matter to me now as they did in the past. Coming back to the beauty parlor visit, the girl accidentally thinned my eyebrows way too much than my normal size. I got a shock as I looked into the mirror. She casually said that she should be told when to stop. I just tipped her and got back to my car. This friend of mine asked me how I could just keep mum and say nothing to that beautician. And then I realized that if the same incident happened to me a couple of years ago, I would have raised a big hue and cry. But now, these things hardly matter to me. No kidding. Laughingly, my dear friend too admitted that it would take a while for her to let go off such things in such an easy manner !!
I mean, I would be lying if I said am not conscious of myself. People who know me will also know my fondness towards my sense of style. I like to be chic, for sure... but it doesn't need to be that perfect as it used to be for me as a teenager. Things can be taken lightly atleast in my case ...that's what I learnt from life.
Today,
--> The more important things which matter to me right now are my kids and family.
--> I am more busy in minding my kids diet than fighting with an unknown girl who accidentally did something to my vanity.
--> I find more bliss in spending an hour at chuck-e-cheese's with the kiddos rather than a quiet candle-light dinner. ( It's not that I've completely turned myself into a saint !! All my occasions are still met out with a dine-out from my hubby dearest , but they don't have to be mandatory.. )
--> I spend so much time with the building up of phonics with my elder son, that they seem to be more important than the programming languages I learnt a few years ago !
And the list goes on.... and yeah, these might seem trivial and humorous to you, but for me the supply of diapers are more important than the recession right now. Of course, after a few years, I might be ashamed to have given less importance to the Mumbai massacre when compared to my son's school programme, but for now, my life is just revolving around these issues which seem important to me right now.
Well, I still do have the temper, but then I reason out immediately and I think it takes some more years to completely let go off the anger in me. Well, don't be surprised if I take a sabbatical from the beauty parlor in a few years too... but for now, must rush for a pedicure and also need to attend my elder one's school program !!! Ciao ....
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Movie madness
I know it's been a while I posted something on my blog...
Frankly, life's been really hectic and my days just revolved around friends, dinners, trips and parties. For some, my life might seem very happening, but I have to admit that it has taken a toll on both my mental and physical health... the whole chaos seemed to have worked otherwise. Sometimes, I wish for a much simpler life, but then it's all in my mind. We are now used to our good old friends' company each weekend, that sometimes life seems bliss like this too , though I have to admit that am getting too tired to give a bit of attention towards my third baby, this blog !!
My last post The true Calling has been met with much criticism, but that's definitely not the reason for such a huge gap between my posts. It's just a coincidence. But, I realize I was being too preachy in my earlier post and it isn't a wonder that it was liked by very few people. So, I decided to just share something wonderful which actually happened with me, instead of shooting my opinions on topics I seemed to have wander off.
Over the past week, I have seen one of the most memorable movies in my entire life !
It being "As good as it gets", having two wonderful Oscar-winning actors, Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt. What a movie !! Anyone who saw this wonderful portrayal of human qualities has to agree with me.
For starters, the story is about a much-hated senior who has an OCD problem, but somehow seems to evolve as a human, when he is forced to help his troubled neighbour and an even-distressed waitress. The opening scene shows the cruelty of the lead man, with him dumping the neighbour's cute puppy into the garbage bin without remorse.. but as the movie continues, he is shown to love the same cute animal.
I was very much touched with the entire thing of "Love thy neighbor" concept, shown in a very subtle way. It just made me realize how little we know of our current neighbors with our crazy, busy schedule. Here, I have to mention my sweet neighbor who makes it a point to give a box of doughnuts every Sunday for my boys ( though I hardly know her more than a Hi, let alone her name). It makes me feel good about being together in a community. If it weren't for her gesture, I wouldn't have thanked her back with a crate of fruits. These older people just make us get the feel-good factor of their generation, with these simple things, and I think its a healthy way for our generation to adapt it too.
This movie also shows the harsh reality of the female lead's son being constantly sick, and how she is just tied up with him the entire day and night. The most heart-touching scene is when the kid starts being treated and feels normal again, (thanks to the grumpy old hero) ...the mom in Helen Hunt just doesn't know how to use her spare time, just because she's petrified of having so much time for herself. It made me really cry and it was so overwhelming, because I was relating it to myself. Not the sickness thing, but right now, being a mom of 2 active kids, my entire day is just for them. I suddenly realized that a day would come when I'll have all the time for myself, when my boys are grown big enough to have their own life. What am I gonna do then ? It's both scary and exhilarating !! Hmm, should really ponder about this... maybe, I've been taking my motherhood thing a bit more obsessed than I should. After all, at the end of the day, your life is yours... especially, when your young ones tend to move further with their own interests and their individual lives.
And then, this movie shows nudity as a form of art too. The gay artist sees the heroine bathing and just draws her, without a sense of lust or obscenity. The entire thing was shown so well, it just made an indelible mark on my heart. Art is such a pure form of one's heart's feelings that it just doesn't seem to have any barriers. In the early scenes, even a ruthless mugger is shown to be affected having seen a wonderful piece of his self-portrait. Such is the greatness of art. You don't need to be a Picasso to understand it, just let your heart open to art in many forms, be it music, dance or paint. It's such a wonderful feeling to let go your heart for sometime into your solitary world of imagination. It definitely soothes a crying or a bored or a troubled heart. Even if you are happy, just express it through these little forms of art, it seems to make a lot of difference to your morale !! There I go with my preachings once again, hehe...All in the habit, you see !
Anyway, just wanted to share these subtle nuances I felt about this movie, and how I related them with my personal life.
One has to agree that it's not every day you encounter such experiences, but when you do feel something heart-warming, make sure you don't neglect them. These are for-a-lifetime simple things, and they make a great diary of wonderful memoirs. Isn't it ?? Think about it.
Frankly, life's been really hectic and my days just revolved around friends, dinners, trips and parties. For some, my life might seem very happening, but I have to admit that it has taken a toll on both my mental and physical health... the whole chaos seemed to have worked otherwise. Sometimes, I wish for a much simpler life, but then it's all in my mind. We are now used to our good old friends' company each weekend, that sometimes life seems bliss like this too , though I have to admit that am getting too tired to give a bit of attention towards my third baby, this blog !!
My last post The true Calling has been met with much criticism, but that's definitely not the reason for such a huge gap between my posts. It's just a coincidence. But, I realize I was being too preachy in my earlier post and it isn't a wonder that it was liked by very few people. So, I decided to just share something wonderful which actually happened with me, instead of shooting my opinions on topics I seemed to have wander off.
Over the past week, I have seen one of the most memorable movies in my entire life !
It being "As good as it gets", having two wonderful Oscar-winning actors, Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt. What a movie !! Anyone who saw this wonderful portrayal of human qualities has to agree with me.
For starters, the story is about a much-hated senior who has an OCD problem, but somehow seems to evolve as a human, when he is forced to help his troubled neighbour and an even-distressed waitress. The opening scene shows the cruelty of the lead man, with him dumping the neighbour's cute puppy into the garbage bin without remorse.. but as the movie continues, he is shown to love the same cute animal.
I was very much touched with the entire thing of "Love thy neighbor" concept, shown in a very subtle way. It just made me realize how little we know of our current neighbors with our crazy, busy schedule. Here, I have to mention my sweet neighbor who makes it a point to give a box of doughnuts every Sunday for my boys ( though I hardly know her more than a Hi, let alone her name). It makes me feel good about being together in a community. If it weren't for her gesture, I wouldn't have thanked her back with a crate of fruits. These older people just make us get the feel-good factor of their generation, with these simple things, and I think its a healthy way for our generation to adapt it too.
This movie also shows the harsh reality of the female lead's son being constantly sick, and how she is just tied up with him the entire day and night. The most heart-touching scene is when the kid starts being treated and feels normal again, (thanks to the grumpy old hero) ...the mom in Helen Hunt just doesn't know how to use her spare time, just because she's petrified of having so much time for herself. It made me really cry and it was so overwhelming, because I was relating it to myself. Not the sickness thing, but right now, being a mom of 2 active kids, my entire day is just for them. I suddenly realized that a day would come when I'll have all the time for myself, when my boys are grown big enough to have their own life. What am I gonna do then ? It's both scary and exhilarating !! Hmm, should really ponder about this... maybe, I've been taking my motherhood thing a bit more obsessed than I should. After all, at the end of the day, your life is yours... especially, when your young ones tend to move further with their own interests and their individual lives.
And then, this movie shows nudity as a form of art too. The gay artist sees the heroine bathing and just draws her, without a sense of lust or obscenity. The entire thing was shown so well, it just made an indelible mark on my heart. Art is such a pure form of one's heart's feelings that it just doesn't seem to have any barriers. In the early scenes, even a ruthless mugger is shown to be affected having seen a wonderful piece of his self-portrait. Such is the greatness of art. You don't need to be a Picasso to understand it, just let your heart open to art in many forms, be it music, dance or paint. It's such a wonderful feeling to let go your heart for sometime into your solitary world of imagination. It definitely soothes a crying or a bored or a troubled heart. Even if you are happy, just express it through these little forms of art, it seems to make a lot of difference to your morale !! There I go with my preachings once again, hehe...All in the habit, you see !
Anyway, just wanted to share these subtle nuances I felt about this movie, and how I related them with my personal life.
One has to agree that it's not every day you encounter such experiences, but when you do feel something heart-warming, make sure you don't neglect them. These are for-a-lifetime simple things, and they make a great diary of wonderful memoirs. Isn't it ?? Think about it.
Friday, November 7, 2008
The True calling
As I reel back to the pages of my childhood, I realize that the most common question any adult asked me was what I liked to become when I grew up. Frankly speaking, it was just a question not expecting an answer out of it. Not only me, any average indian kid wasn't given much of an option. However, as a studious child, I was the favourite among all my uncles and aunts. Everyone just hoped for me to become something big in life, and achieve really something stellar ! I remember my Dad getting these competitive books for me, while I was not even a high-schooler, and took great joy when I solved those mind-boggling puzzles. Some people commented that I would indeed have to write my IAS examination, which everyone took it for granted that I would pass with flying colors anyway. That much of a confidence in me!
Okay, before you roll up your eyes and doubt my credibility towards this issue, I have to mention that it was indeed true that I was the most sought-after child in my entire clan. However, I remember one particular cousin of my mom sarcastically saying that a girl ( especially in India) cannot entirely realize her dream of becoming whatever she wants, and that she has to succumb to the wants of the society. Maybe, at that moment, I used to flare up at him for demeaning the female population, but now as I look not only into my life, but also the many "dependant-spouse" girls, giving up their careers for the sake of marital bliss, I just nod at the world-wise wisdom of my then-sardonic uncle.
Maybe, we should start off with the education systems prevailing in various places, which is a major influence in the life of an individual. Education in India is entirely a different school of thought. Now, as I send my 4 yr old son to an American private preschool, I realize many major differences in the two cultures. It's definitely "East and West" !! So opposite to each other in their approach, method and values too.
-->A three-year old in India is expected to stop wearing diapers, wear pants and march triumphantly to his kindergarten. Here, a child isn't admitted to the kindergarten until he is 5. School is actually FUN for kids in America, whereas I can still visualise the strict teachers and the stringent rules and the wailing kids in Indian schools.
-->As we grew up, passing through the various phases of school, the most important milestone had to be the 10th std. I can very well understand and remember the immense pressure a 15 year old kid faces both from his school and his parents to fulfil their first dream. Then comes the scenario of choosing your stream for further education. Mostly, its either Maths for prospective engineers and Science for the future doctors. These days, the option of choosing something else than these, like Economics or Commerce is totally alien and looked down a bit low too.(Please note that am talking about the prevalent system in South India especially) With the introduction of innumerable aggressive tutorials, vying the parents with the promise that their average child can also become an Engineer or a Doctor, the entire education system has only become a hungry market-place !
-->With two constant years of non-stop grinding, the student clears the entrance examination. I still remember Aug 2, 2000. The date of my engineering counselling. Students along with their worried parents are made to wait for endless hours, before they are made to sit before a counseller and a computer, showing the various available seats at that particular time (depending on our rank in the exam too). I am pretty much sure about a student's uncertainity in selecting his branch. Nothing depended on your interest. Everything was focussed on the seat availability and that particular branch's demand.
-->Four years into an engineering college involves a lot of changes in the adolescent, constantly reminded by the angry lecturers that we are no longer kids !! The confusing stage of teens is slowly converted into the even-more-confusing adolescence, and is just revolved around labs, libraries and of course, the "choti si love stories". Doesn't this bring a smile back to your lips ??
-->I should say that four years are definitely not enough for a confusing individual to completely understand the stream of your education. Despite the many deadlines to meet, parents force their kids to prepare for some more competitive exams for accomplishing their masters abroad, right since their third year or so. Another dream seen through the eyes of an over-ambitious parent. Finally, America beckons and here the ordinary Indian kid arrives with the million dollar dreams.
-->Two years of the most hectic days in an American school, juggling between internships, odd jobs and reports to be meted out, the kid who started living the American dream in the most enthusiastic way, is slowly reduced into a money-minting machine. The evolution of an NRI. Or more so, a software engineer ! Ironically, very few people graduating in a non-software stream choose to remain in their own specialised field. The rest of the herd is thrown into the maddenning software cattle and the journey embarks on the "Survival of the fittest" !!
In this entire process of a person evolving from a wailing preschooler to a crazy NRI, the true calling of a person is definitely sleeping in the grave. In the process of achieving your parents' dream, you tend to go overboard in fulfilling their goals and not yours. A chid's goals are always understated. Mom knows the best or Dad knows the best. A child can never take his own decisions. Isn't it so unfair ? Why should an individual not choose what he can become in his life? Is it always the parents who has to make the decisions for them? I do agree about parents knowing much better than us, but it can be restricted to only some worldly wisdom words for the kids, and not indulge themselves into almost all the issues of a child. A child can want to become an interior designer, or an artist or even a hair-stylist. Each individual interests are definitely varied and they should be respected, and not be looked down. Every profession has a certain set of rules and people playing by them have been immensely successful in their respective careers. You just don't need to be an engineer or a doctor to call it kicks.
Before you decide what your kid wants to be, be sure to ask him what he wants to be and also learn to listen to their heart. Don't be surprised with the wackiest of answers from your toddler. For him, a firefighter is also an option !! But who knows, whats his real calling ?? Its time to wake up and give him a boost of his interest. Success will definitely beckon your little one, as they grow up.
As for me, I too, like any ordinary parent, dream of sending my kids to Harvard or Oxford !! But, who knows?? My little ones might want to become something else and surprise me entirely. I realize that the only thing which lies in my hands is to ensure that they turn out to be wonderful persons, and that's my true calling now !! "A full-time mom" hehe... Did anyone in my childhood ever imagine me of this?? Well, someone in the family has to bake and clean, and am good at them too. So, whats there to complain ? But yeah, did I mention that my secret ambition is to become a famous news-reader.... despite me having a Bachelors in Information Technology ????
That's life.... full of surprises... both good and bad.
You take your call !! Its really TIME ...
Okay, before you roll up your eyes and doubt my credibility towards this issue, I have to mention that it was indeed true that I was the most sought-after child in my entire clan. However, I remember one particular cousin of my mom sarcastically saying that a girl ( especially in India) cannot entirely realize her dream of becoming whatever she wants, and that she has to succumb to the wants of the society. Maybe, at that moment, I used to flare up at him for demeaning the female population, but now as I look not only into my life, but also the many "dependant-spouse" girls, giving up their careers for the sake of marital bliss, I just nod at the world-wise wisdom of my then-sardonic uncle.
Maybe, we should start off with the education systems prevailing in various places, which is a major influence in the life of an individual. Education in India is entirely a different school of thought. Now, as I send my 4 yr old son to an American private preschool, I realize many major differences in the two cultures. It's definitely "East and West" !! So opposite to each other in their approach, method and values too.
-->A three-year old in India is expected to stop wearing diapers, wear pants and march triumphantly to his kindergarten. Here, a child isn't admitted to the kindergarten until he is 5. School is actually FUN for kids in America, whereas I can still visualise the strict teachers and the stringent rules and the wailing kids in Indian schools.
-->As we grew up, passing through the various phases of school, the most important milestone had to be the 10th std. I can very well understand and remember the immense pressure a 15 year old kid faces both from his school and his parents to fulfil their first dream. Then comes the scenario of choosing your stream for further education. Mostly, its either Maths for prospective engineers and Science for the future doctors. These days, the option of choosing something else than these, like Economics or Commerce is totally alien and looked down a bit low too.(Please note that am talking about the prevalent system in South India especially) With the introduction of innumerable aggressive tutorials, vying the parents with the promise that their average child can also become an Engineer or a Doctor, the entire education system has only become a hungry market-place !
-->With two constant years of non-stop grinding, the student clears the entrance examination. I still remember Aug 2, 2000. The date of my engineering counselling. Students along with their worried parents are made to wait for endless hours, before they are made to sit before a counseller and a computer, showing the various available seats at that particular time (depending on our rank in the exam too). I am pretty much sure about a student's uncertainity in selecting his branch. Nothing depended on your interest. Everything was focussed on the seat availability and that particular branch's demand.
-->Four years into an engineering college involves a lot of changes in the adolescent, constantly reminded by the angry lecturers that we are no longer kids !! The confusing stage of teens is slowly converted into the even-more-confusing adolescence, and is just revolved around labs, libraries and of course, the "choti si love stories". Doesn't this bring a smile back to your lips ??
-->I should say that four years are definitely not enough for a confusing individual to completely understand the stream of your education. Despite the many deadlines to meet, parents force their kids to prepare for some more competitive exams for accomplishing their masters abroad, right since their third year or so. Another dream seen through the eyes of an over-ambitious parent. Finally, America beckons and here the ordinary Indian kid arrives with the million dollar dreams.
-->Two years of the most hectic days in an American school, juggling between internships, odd jobs and reports to be meted out, the kid who started living the American dream in the most enthusiastic way, is slowly reduced into a money-minting machine. The evolution of an NRI. Or more so, a software engineer ! Ironically, very few people graduating in a non-software stream choose to remain in their own specialised field. The rest of the herd is thrown into the maddenning software cattle and the journey embarks on the "Survival of the fittest" !!
In this entire process of a person evolving from a wailing preschooler to a crazy NRI, the true calling of a person is definitely sleeping in the grave. In the process of achieving your parents' dream, you tend to go overboard in fulfilling their goals and not yours. A chid's goals are always understated. Mom knows the best or Dad knows the best. A child can never take his own decisions. Isn't it so unfair ? Why should an individual not choose what he can become in his life? Is it always the parents who has to make the decisions for them? I do agree about parents knowing much better than us, but it can be restricted to only some worldly wisdom words for the kids, and not indulge themselves into almost all the issues of a child. A child can want to become an interior designer, or an artist or even a hair-stylist. Each individual interests are definitely varied and they should be respected, and not be looked down. Every profession has a certain set of rules and people playing by them have been immensely successful in their respective careers. You just don't need to be an engineer or a doctor to call it kicks.
Before you decide what your kid wants to be, be sure to ask him what he wants to be and also learn to listen to their heart. Don't be surprised with the wackiest of answers from your toddler. For him, a firefighter is also an option !! But who knows, whats his real calling ?? Its time to wake up and give him a boost of his interest. Success will definitely beckon your little one, as they grow up.
As for me, I too, like any ordinary parent, dream of sending my kids to Harvard or Oxford !! But, who knows?? My little ones might want to become something else and surprise me entirely. I realize that the only thing which lies in my hands is to ensure that they turn out to be wonderful persons, and that's my true calling now !! "A full-time mom" hehe... Did anyone in my childhood ever imagine me of this?? Well, someone in the family has to bake and clean, and am good at them too. So, whats there to complain ? But yeah, did I mention that my secret ambition is to become a famous news-reader.... despite me having a Bachelors in Information Technology ????
That's life.... full of surprises... both good and bad.
You take your call !! Its really TIME ...
Sunday, November 2, 2008
The Simple Life
Life !
The transformation of the girl inside me to a modern-day woman has made me realize the drastic changes over these years in my life. Am not talking about the relationships here! I have done enough with them in my earlier posts anyway. But, what am trying to pen down here are the little things we tend to forget in this maddenning, competitive world.
Technology has undoubtedly creeped into our simple lives, having its pros and cons. Of course, with the advent of new machines, life has become faster and more efficient. But yeah, it's a lot more complicated than the simple, old times.
---> Am talking about the good old times of our grandmoms, where unadultered food was one of the main ways of showing love. The aromas of home-made butter, the endless delicacies during festivals, and not to mention, the fresh milk from milkmen walking down their clanking belled cows down the road. Right now, for any modern day woman, the haven for food issues are ready-to-eat meals easily found in any supermart! I have to admit am one among them (for some rare evenings when my home-cooked food becomes a bore!), but I still crave for those yummy dishes my grandmom used to dish out for us as soon as we asked them for. Those were the times!
---> As a kid, I still remember writing letters to my old friends in another town. That was the age when the world wasn't totally acclaimed by the omnipresent internet.(in the early 90's). The good old way of writing letters! Don't you think with the exchange of the daily emails, the old-fashioned way of scribbling our thoughts with our own hands has literally gone with the wind? I strongly feel that hand-written letters are a sweet way of conveying one's love. I used to call the endless love-letters I used to write for my hubby as "Holy manuscripts" ! That was of course, during the golden phase of the engagement-marriage days, when email was still a very much not-so-common entity. They are still treasured back in my mom's place, and I just love smelling them, whenever I visit my mom. They just remind me of the good times, the forgotten funny incidents, and it also serves as a way to rekindle our old flames(just in case, we forget with our daily crazy schedule).
Don't you think it's time we revisit the post-office yet again? Not so regularly, but atleast once in a while ???
---> As kids, me and my brother had always been very much varied with our personal interests. He was a major animal lover, and literally cried until he got his very own puppy, at the age of 8. I was this not-so-friendly girl with the canine family, and one such addition to our own family was a bit disturbing to me. In the intial days of our home-coming puppy, I dreaded going back home from school. Both my mom and my bro took great care of the little member, while I just watched it from a distance. As time passed, I gradually started liking the pet, and more so it had become a part of our life too. I have started to like animals, and never got scared of them, as in the initial days. The cutie pie stayed on with us for a whopping 12 years( a quality time for a canine), before it succumbed to a fatal sunstroke. I still remember the day it left us forever. I cried more than anyone else in the family. Maybe, all the feelings I bottled up for it since childhood had just seemed to overflow. My brother, on the contrary, took it in his stride, and surprisingly just prayed for its soul calmly.
Now, with two sons and a not-at-all animal friendly husband, I yearn of having my own pet. Maybe, when my boys grow a bit more. I am still hoping for my younger one to cry and get a puppy home, ala his uncle. The good old times will start again!
---> I read somewhere about loving the nature around you. An European author wrote about people living in America, that they just don't seem to find time for anything except their routine. She got nostalgic about her earlier life in Europe, where people actually stop to smell the roses even during a busy day. Isn't is wonderfully romantic? Or to say the least, isn't it a nice way to love the nature?
When I was a kid, we had a patio full of plants in our house. My mom was this nature-crazy woman, whom you already are aware of her fondness for animals. And this was just another great hobby my mom inculcated. The art of raising plants. Having a living organism in your house puts a whole lot of responsibility on your mind. It definitely helps you stay alert. It can be just a pot-plant or a pet too. But, the goal my mom put us was to drill in more compassion towards others. And the charity just began from home. We were given the tasks of watering the plants, and walking our doggy, even as kids. Now, as I realize that I keep giving umpteen excuses for either having a pet or atleast some plants in my house, I remind myself of my mom and also the European lady who smelt roses on her way to office. Isn't it the finest tribute to nature? And it should start from home.
But, of course, as I started on... Modern-day evolution and it's impact on our daily life has its share of advantages too.
The first being the internet. How can I ever thank this great medium for letting me be in touch with all my old buddies at a click's distance. Would it have been possible to share my life's memories through pictures, videos and not to mention, this blog, without the internet's sprawling presence into our lives? Its definitely way much easier to reach out to an old friend, than in the old days.
Another important thing I realize being a mom is to have a better life now in the 21st century, than in the old times. Starting with the basic diapers, readymade foods, strollers, the list of making a mom's life easier is just endless.
And of course, kudos to all the scientists who invented the various electronic devices. I simply can't imagine my life without the basic stuff like, the washing machine, blender, or even the TV. Life would have been very difficult without any one of them too.
But, before you jump into conclusions that this post is a bunch of contradictions, I just wanted you to know my feelings towards the life we are presently leading. If you still find it contradictary, then you need to blame the life we are leading in this 21st century. Its a whirlwind of activities, spurned with the magic spell of modern-day technology.
That being said, yeah, I still dream of a small garden house, with my large dog looming around the house, and my kids bathing in the nearby pond. Well, am just dreaming now!! I have that much freedom. It's my idea of a "SIMPLE LIFE" !!
Whats yours ????
The transformation of the girl inside me to a modern-day woman has made me realize the drastic changes over these years in my life. Am not talking about the relationships here! I have done enough with them in my earlier posts anyway. But, what am trying to pen down here are the little things we tend to forget in this maddenning, competitive world.
Technology has undoubtedly creeped into our simple lives, having its pros and cons. Of course, with the advent of new machines, life has become faster and more efficient. But yeah, it's a lot more complicated than the simple, old times.
---> Am talking about the good old times of our grandmoms, where unadultered food was one of the main ways of showing love. The aromas of home-made butter, the endless delicacies during festivals, and not to mention, the fresh milk from milkmen walking down their clanking belled cows down the road. Right now, for any modern day woman, the haven for food issues are ready-to-eat meals easily found in any supermart! I have to admit am one among them (for some rare evenings when my home-cooked food becomes a bore!), but I still crave for those yummy dishes my grandmom used to dish out for us as soon as we asked them for. Those were the times!
---> As a kid, I still remember writing letters to my old friends in another town. That was the age when the world wasn't totally acclaimed by the omnipresent internet.(in the early 90's). The good old way of writing letters! Don't you think with the exchange of the daily emails, the old-fashioned way of scribbling our thoughts with our own hands has literally gone with the wind? I strongly feel that hand-written letters are a sweet way of conveying one's love. I used to call the endless love-letters I used to write for my hubby as "Holy manuscripts" ! That was of course, during the golden phase of the engagement-marriage days, when email was still a very much not-so-common entity. They are still treasured back in my mom's place, and I just love smelling them, whenever I visit my mom. They just remind me of the good times, the forgotten funny incidents, and it also serves as a way to rekindle our old flames(just in case, we forget with our daily crazy schedule).
Don't you think it's time we revisit the post-office yet again? Not so regularly, but atleast once in a while ???
---> As kids, me and my brother had always been very much varied with our personal interests. He was a major animal lover, and literally cried until he got his very own puppy, at the age of 8. I was this not-so-friendly girl with the canine family, and one such addition to our own family was a bit disturbing to me. In the intial days of our home-coming puppy, I dreaded going back home from school. Both my mom and my bro took great care of the little member, while I just watched it from a distance. As time passed, I gradually started liking the pet, and more so it had become a part of our life too. I have started to like animals, and never got scared of them, as in the initial days. The cutie pie stayed on with us for a whopping 12 years( a quality time for a canine), before it succumbed to a fatal sunstroke. I still remember the day it left us forever. I cried more than anyone else in the family. Maybe, all the feelings I bottled up for it since childhood had just seemed to overflow. My brother, on the contrary, took it in his stride, and surprisingly just prayed for its soul calmly.
Now, with two sons and a not-at-all animal friendly husband, I yearn of having my own pet. Maybe, when my boys grow a bit more. I am still hoping for my younger one to cry and get a puppy home, ala his uncle. The good old times will start again!
---> I read somewhere about loving the nature around you. An European author wrote about people living in America, that they just don't seem to find time for anything except their routine. She got nostalgic about her earlier life in Europe, where people actually stop to smell the roses even during a busy day. Isn't is wonderfully romantic? Or to say the least, isn't it a nice way to love the nature?
When I was a kid, we had a patio full of plants in our house. My mom was this nature-crazy woman, whom you already are aware of her fondness for animals. And this was just another great hobby my mom inculcated. The art of raising plants. Having a living organism in your house puts a whole lot of responsibility on your mind. It definitely helps you stay alert. It can be just a pot-plant or a pet too. But, the goal my mom put us was to drill in more compassion towards others. And the charity just began from home. We were given the tasks of watering the plants, and walking our doggy, even as kids. Now, as I realize that I keep giving umpteen excuses for either having a pet or atleast some plants in my house, I remind myself of my mom and also the European lady who smelt roses on her way to office. Isn't it the finest tribute to nature? And it should start from home.
But, of course, as I started on... Modern-day evolution and it's impact on our daily life has its share of advantages too.
The first being the internet. How can I ever thank this great medium for letting me be in touch with all my old buddies at a click's distance. Would it have been possible to share my life's memories through pictures, videos and not to mention, this blog, without the internet's sprawling presence into our lives? Its definitely way much easier to reach out to an old friend, than in the old days.
Another important thing I realize being a mom is to have a better life now in the 21st century, than in the old times. Starting with the basic diapers, readymade foods, strollers, the list of making a mom's life easier is just endless.
And of course, kudos to all the scientists who invented the various electronic devices. I simply can't imagine my life without the basic stuff like, the washing machine, blender, or even the TV. Life would have been very difficult without any one of them too.
But, before you jump into conclusions that this post is a bunch of contradictions, I just wanted you to know my feelings towards the life we are presently leading. If you still find it contradictary, then you need to blame the life we are leading in this 21st century. Its a whirlwind of activities, spurned with the magic spell of modern-day technology.
That being said, yeah, I still dream of a small garden house, with my large dog looming around the house, and my kids bathing in the nearby pond. Well, am just dreaming now!! I have that much freedom. It's my idea of a "SIMPLE LIFE" !!
Whats yours ????
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Friends
Listen !
FRIENDS !
An integral part of my life! People who know me definitely identify me with my friendly nature. Am an easy-going and a very friendly person. Over the years, I met some very wonderful people, whom I can easily call them as buddies. I have a lot of acquaintances, but only some qualify as my best pals, whom I can actually share anything under the sun.
I wouldn't like to mention their names, not knowing how they would react to a public blog. But am sure that they would identify themselves, as they read on.....
My first friend and the best one is my mom. No prizes for guessing that! God has given me a really, wonderful mother who is not only friendly, but also very understanding. I owe her not only my life, but a lot many traits in myself, which my family is immensely proud of.
My brother seconds the list of my best friends. Not having too much of a gap in our age, me and my brother have always been good friends since childhood. There was never a major sibling rivalry amongst us. There was never a fierce competition between us for anything. The only thing we fought over might have been our mom's attention. My brother left us and started his big steps towards the real world, when he went off to study in an engineering hostel in Northern India. It's almost 6 years me and my bro have actually lived under the same roof, thanks to his studies and my marriage, but the bond we still share is totally telepathic.
The next one is a friend, a very dear one, whom I have shared my school life with, whom I was always identified as an identical twin, and whom I shared a love-hate relationship through my teens, and with whom I now share some very warm vibes. She has been my alter-ego as a child, competing with me in every aspect. However, there were very little squabbles as kids and undoubtedly, we enjoyed every phase of our school life. As we grew and were passing through the confusing stage of teens, our social circle grew and so did our friends, thus tearing us apart. At one stage, we just couldn't stand each other for no absolute reason. Please blame our age !! However, as we sobered down, me with my family, and she doing extremely well with her career and looking forward to a great marriage with her college sweetheart, we share a great relation now. She's going to be a friend for life. And no doubts about it.
The next friend am going to mention is a great one. We just studied two years together, but the vibes we share until now are simply amazing. I've been through her lows and highs, and have seen her actually cry in my lap too. We shared some most memorable moments, speaking of boys, crushes, movies and all the silly sweet-nothings in the sands of Vizag beaches. The sands of time passed on, but it only strengthened our friendship. It's not an exaggeration that there isn't a single day which passed by in the past decade without being in touch with each other. We adapt to each other's feelings so well, that it proves that one need not meet each other frequently, so as to share this kind of a feeling. Can you believe that it's almost three years I met her, with us pulled apart with our respective busy lives? But, she's the only friend who's been this constant sweetheart and a great supporter for anything which I attempted in my life, be it my motherhood or even my blog. She even likes me sneeze too.... Silly girl !!
Another great friend is who has actually helped me look into life at a newer angle. I have lots of male friends, but none has ever been this close to my heart. I have no squalms in actually saying this too. People's choice of words maybe different, but I have just one word to describe him, a buddy ! A person whom I can count upon, a person whom I can vent all my feelings uninhibitedly, a person who adores me to the hilt. We've had umpteen number of philosophical discussions, which actually amazes me with his knowledge on the real world. For his age, guys tend to act immature and childish, atleast when compared to the girls of his age...But, he has always amazed me with his child-like yet matured qualities of handling a situation. That being said, he is the only guy I identify my dad with his qualities. That itself is an example of how much he has actually impressed me. Unlucky chap, he's just late by a decade !! hehe... Jokes apart, I keep thanking him for putting up with all my weird ideas, and he is always welcome and acts up that putting up with my goofy nature is a pleasure too.
And last but not the least, I have to mention my husband, for being my buddy for over a decade. Obviously, I don't need to explain the rapport I share with my husband, but I have to give credit to him for putting up with all my childish impishness all these years. He's been a wonderful listener and great outlet for my yakkity-yak, until ofcourse I started blogging. I think he better thank this blog, for relieving him off his duties as a patient let-out of my forever excitement.
Thanks everyone for listening to me. This post is dedicated to all the above-mentioned people. Thanks for being in my life !!
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
The balancing Act !
With my husband and I completing a decade in companionship, we celebrated it with a bit shopping and a "not-so-quiet" dinner(with the kids banging others tables )in my favourite restaurant. Over my dinner, I was pondering over the amount of time we spent together fighting and squabbling and eventually making it over. As a couple, we definitely had some lows and some bad times, but it has always been the heavenly knot of marriage that bound us together. For Sure !
As a teenager, I remember reading a book called "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus". So, how many people are there with me ? I know its a pretty famous book, mostly with the fairer sex. I guess, the guys wouldn't even bother to know the differences between the two sexes, let alone reading a whole book on it. Thats exactly where the difference actually lies between a man and a woman! Isnt it ? I am not entirely sure about the planetary behaviour of men and women, but dont you think that its "EARTH" where we have to live in together, and bear each others moods for the rest of the lives? Thats when I realized the wonderful art of balancing each other for "earthly" living. Read on ....
Now, lets call the male mentality as "The Mars thing (M)" and the female mentality as "The Venus thing(V)"... and the art of adjusting can be called obviously as "The Earth thing(E)". I am not too sure about the other couples, but I would like to relate my own balancing act with my dearest hubby.
Cleanliness
M : He was this not-so-tidy guy, who was the least conscious of the surroundings. Would you believe that he used to actually throw papers and groundnut leftovers in the living room itself, as if it were a park??
V : I've been raised by this ultra-cleanliness freak type of a mom, who wouldn't let anything be disorganized in her house. A little genes, a little habit... made me an organized freak too. Of course, my brother didn't entirely pick that habit....so, I should mention that I am not blaming my mother-in-law for my husband's untidy habits. Maybe, its just a guy thing !
E : The balancing act ?? He does the vacuuming every week (sometimes being told, sometimes on his own) and he is now so much used to everything being in place in our house, he just finds it difficult to realize that he was something very opposite of what he is now !
Cooking
M : I should mention here that my mom-in-law is a great cook, and a fast one at that too. Its definitely the genes here, my husband is a great connoisseur of food and loves cooking. If not for a software pro, his next best career option would have been being a chef ! (Not to mention, he still dreams of owning a restaurant). He loves entertaining people with dinners and lunches, and with his signature dishes. He just beams when people admire his food, and absolutely loves every moment in the kitchen( unlike many guys i know ) I don't need to add that he was my cooking Guru, and what a teacher !!
V : As a geek I was, I never showed interest in cooking prior to getting hitched. The maximum I could make was a wonderful Tea, and that was it. In fact, I was so absorbed in my world of books and stuff, that I used to forget to switch off the stove too (if my mom had to run an errand while cooking). Post-marriage, I had this strange feeling that I would get sick of the kitchen very soon, with my husband hovering over the dishes and constantly teaching, while I was cooking.
E : Seven years and two kids later, I enjoy my cooking very much now. Thanks to the culinary interest my husband got, I developed it along with him and now try all types of cuisines( including Thai, chinese and Italian too). Need to try my hand at baking yet. My husband, however, is still the better cook !!
Cricket
M : It must be the typical Indian male syndrome. The Cricket thing. He's been this fervent fan of Indian cricket, but sometimes,I find it irritating to see him watching the highlights of some random "Kenya-Holland" team cricket too. Currently, he plays cricket weekly, featuring in the local tournaments too. The energy he possesses for the game is incredible. Even after an entire night of playing cards, he would still wake up at the wee hours of saturday morning for the game.
V : As a proud indian, I just knew that there is a certain Mr.Sachin Tendulkar in the Indian cricket team. I never even knew his middle name(My husband actually knows the statistics of every single match and the team members too.... shame on me).
E : I have never developed the taste for the game, but I try to indulge in his animated conversations about the boring Test matches and somewhat-interesting one-day matches. Hey, now I know that a cricket team consists of 11 members. So, isnt that quite a balance ?? hehe.
Movies
M : He comes from a family, where movies are completely alien. As far as I know, their family watched only one movie together in their entire lifetime. Need I say more ?
V : I come from a family where entertainment is spelt with "Cinema". As kids, I remember watching every possible movie with my family almost every Saturday. My dad was a major movie buff, and both me and my brother have definitely inherited that trait.
E : We now watch all kind of movies almost every weekend. My husband prefers the heavy-duty action Hollywood though, while I opt for the mushy Bollywood and Telugu movies. In the end, my kids are having a great view of the cinema world in all the languages possible.
Management
M : My husband, is a great manager(sometimes, I call him the "Manipulator"... but thats too insulting, maybe and it isn't true too). He's just very good at getting things done, even with a stranger. He's capable of getting awesome deals on anything he tries his hands on. I hope he isn't winking at the receptionist, while I am not looking around. hehe
V : I have always kept to myself. Being a quiet child, and now being a mom of 2 active kids, I hardly manage things with the outside world. And with such an able partner by the side, why do I really have to bother ?
E : But yeah, we do balance each other with the right kind of financial planning. The bills, credit cards, everything is discussed every month, and I think that's a healthy sign in our relationship.
Kids
M : My husband has always been enthusiastic about kids. But he isn't this coochi-coo types, who would play endless hours with his kids. Because of his gruelling office schedules, he gets a comparatively lesser time than me to spend around with the kiddos.
V : Me, being a full-time mom, knows all the kids needs and wants. Sometimes, their language is comprehensible only to me. I understand every single gesture of theirs, but I guess, it comes along with the whole package of being a stay-at-home mom., and am glad about it too.
E : We definitely try to balance the kids thing, by sharing their activities throughout the day. The weekends are generally managed more by my dearest hubby, who tries to give me a sort of rest, by allowing me to indulge in retail therapy.... while he baby-sits them.
Fashion
M : Here, I have to mention that my husband was this ultra-modern guy, with his chic sense of dress and style. He could be qualified as a metro-sexual, and I was more than shocked when he revealed that he actually used cream bleach for his face(Thank God, its only once during his teens !!). Having said that, he has a keen sense of fashion and a truckload of patience while shopping too.
V : During college, I was this ultra-geek girl, with spectacles on(just for headache, but I thought that they would give me a nice,geeky feel... hehe) and with long-sleeves salwar-kameez all the time. I was introduced to the world of western fashion by my then-fiance himself. I hardly knew what make-up was too.
E : My husband has sobered down with his shopping attitude, but still loves buying new clothes for me and my kids. As for me, I have completely evolved myself into fashion, and now love wearing make-up and jewellery, according to the ocassion.
Gadgets
M : My husband is a major gizmo freak. I loving call him GG(Gadget Guru). He keeps track of all the latest boy-toys in the market, and keeps fiddling with them. I jokingly say of my husband " He runs on batteries!!". Not true in all cases though..hehe
V : I have a fair knowledge of the current technology, but I dont let it overpower my daily life. I am this simple girl, who would prefer a basic phone to a PDA.
E : Both of us being so much different in this issue, is in itself a balancing act. Thanks to him, we have all the latest gadgets at home, and thanks to me, we don't go completely overboard.
Friends
M : My husband has a very less social circle, in terms of friends. His colleagues are his current friends, and the rapport he shares with everyone is never overboard.He has very less personal friends, and hardly hangs out with anyone of them. The only current passion is his cricket, for which I have no complaints anymore.
V : For me, friends form an integral part of my life. I just can't do without them. I need to be in touch with all my buddies, and it's just a part of my routine. Though I don't get to hang out with my friends, because of my motherhood, I atleast keep myself entertained through phones.
E : Though my husband has very few buddies, we have these parties for my friends, where he joins my group of friends in the most friendly way. I love the way he indulges himself and tries to be one among them. It's one way of showing that he cares for me and my friendship.
Communication
M : My hubby is the typical male, the calmer type. He doesn't speak a lot, atleast as compared to me.
V : I am this non-stop yakkity yak girl, who can actually joke with a total stranger too.
E : The balancing act ?? yeah, I still do the talking and he does the listening part(never know when he dozes off, though... hehe).
Romance
M : He is the typical Capricon male, where you cannot expect running around trees, and proposing a girl with knees on the ground. He is this higly rooted-to-reality type guy, where romance do exists, but maintains that you don't need to remind it every single moment.
V : I am this ultra-filmy girl, highly influenced by movies like DDLJ, and used to also listen for the fictitious guitar strumming. Silly na ? Even now, I would love to express love through flowers, gifts and a simple gesture. I know am expecting it too much, but that's me.
E : Thanks to a friend, I realized that guys aren't totally expressive, atleast as much as I thought. But that doesn't mean that they love us lesser than we do. Its just that guys don't have the Romance cells working as much as the female brain. So, let it be. Atleast, its an achievement that we celebrate our "First kiss day" "First phone day" (on my reminder) too.
These were only some examples about our bitter-sweet relationship. Did I hear someone say "Opposites attract !" ?
As a teenager, I remember reading a book called "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus". So, how many people are there with me ? I know its a pretty famous book, mostly with the fairer sex. I guess, the guys wouldn't even bother to know the differences between the two sexes, let alone reading a whole book on it. Thats exactly where the difference actually lies between a man and a woman! Isnt it ? I am not entirely sure about the planetary behaviour of men and women, but dont you think that its "EARTH" where we have to live in together, and bear each others moods for the rest of the lives? Thats when I realized the wonderful art of balancing each other for "earthly" living. Read on ....
Now, lets call the male mentality as "The Mars thing (M)" and the female mentality as "The Venus thing(V)"... and the art of adjusting can be called obviously as "The Earth thing(E)". I am not too sure about the other couples, but I would like to relate my own balancing act with my dearest hubby.
Cleanliness
M : He was this not-so-tidy guy, who was the least conscious of the surroundings. Would you believe that he used to actually throw papers and groundnut leftovers in the living room itself, as if it were a park??
V : I've been raised by this ultra-cleanliness freak type of a mom, who wouldn't let anything be disorganized in her house. A little genes, a little habit... made me an organized freak too. Of course, my brother didn't entirely pick that habit....so, I should mention that I am not blaming my mother-in-law for my husband's untidy habits. Maybe, its just a guy thing !
E : The balancing act ?? He does the vacuuming every week (sometimes being told, sometimes on his own) and he is now so much used to everything being in place in our house, he just finds it difficult to realize that he was something very opposite of what he is now !
Cooking
M : I should mention here that my mom-in-law is a great cook, and a fast one at that too. Its definitely the genes here, my husband is a great connoisseur of food and loves cooking. If not for a software pro, his next best career option would have been being a chef ! (Not to mention, he still dreams of owning a restaurant). He loves entertaining people with dinners and lunches, and with his signature dishes. He just beams when people admire his food, and absolutely loves every moment in the kitchen( unlike many guys i know ) I don't need to add that he was my cooking Guru, and what a teacher !!
V : As a geek I was, I never showed interest in cooking prior to getting hitched. The maximum I could make was a wonderful Tea, and that was it. In fact, I was so absorbed in my world of books and stuff, that I used to forget to switch off the stove too (if my mom had to run an errand while cooking). Post-marriage, I had this strange feeling that I would get sick of the kitchen very soon, with my husband hovering over the dishes and constantly teaching, while I was cooking.
E : Seven years and two kids later, I enjoy my cooking very much now. Thanks to the culinary interest my husband got, I developed it along with him and now try all types of cuisines( including Thai, chinese and Italian too). Need to try my hand at baking yet. My husband, however, is still the better cook !!
Cricket
M : It must be the typical Indian male syndrome. The Cricket thing. He's been this fervent fan of Indian cricket, but sometimes,I find it irritating to see him watching the highlights of some random "Kenya-Holland" team cricket too. Currently, he plays cricket weekly, featuring in the local tournaments too. The energy he possesses for the game is incredible. Even after an entire night of playing cards, he would still wake up at the wee hours of saturday morning for the game.
V : As a proud indian, I just knew that there is a certain Mr.Sachin Tendulkar in the Indian cricket team. I never even knew his middle name(My husband actually knows the statistics of every single match and the team members too.... shame on me).
E : I have never developed the taste for the game, but I try to indulge in his animated conversations about the boring Test matches and somewhat-interesting one-day matches. Hey, now I know that a cricket team consists of 11 members. So, isnt that quite a balance ?? hehe.
Movies
M : He comes from a family, where movies are completely alien. As far as I know, their family watched only one movie together in their entire lifetime. Need I say more ?
V : I come from a family where entertainment is spelt with "Cinema". As kids, I remember watching every possible movie with my family almost every Saturday. My dad was a major movie buff, and both me and my brother have definitely inherited that trait.
E : We now watch all kind of movies almost every weekend. My husband prefers the heavy-duty action Hollywood though, while I opt for the mushy Bollywood and Telugu movies. In the end, my kids are having a great view of the cinema world in all the languages possible.
Management
M : My husband, is a great manager(sometimes, I call him the "Manipulator"... but thats too insulting, maybe and it isn't true too). He's just very good at getting things done, even with a stranger. He's capable of getting awesome deals on anything he tries his hands on. I hope he isn't winking at the receptionist, while I am not looking around. hehe
V : I have always kept to myself. Being a quiet child, and now being a mom of 2 active kids, I hardly manage things with the outside world. And with such an able partner by the side, why do I really have to bother ?
E : But yeah, we do balance each other with the right kind of financial planning. The bills, credit cards, everything is discussed every month, and I think that's a healthy sign in our relationship.
Kids
M : My husband has always been enthusiastic about kids. But he isn't this coochi-coo types, who would play endless hours with his kids. Because of his gruelling office schedules, he gets a comparatively lesser time than me to spend around with the kiddos.
V : Me, being a full-time mom, knows all the kids needs and wants. Sometimes, their language is comprehensible only to me. I understand every single gesture of theirs, but I guess, it comes along with the whole package of being a stay-at-home mom., and am glad about it too.
E : We definitely try to balance the kids thing, by sharing their activities throughout the day. The weekends are generally managed more by my dearest hubby, who tries to give me a sort of rest, by allowing me to indulge in retail therapy.... while he baby-sits them.
Fashion
M : Here, I have to mention that my husband was this ultra-modern guy, with his chic sense of dress and style. He could be qualified as a metro-sexual, and I was more than shocked when he revealed that he actually used cream bleach for his face(Thank God, its only once during his teens !!). Having said that, he has a keen sense of fashion and a truckload of patience while shopping too.
V : During college, I was this ultra-geek girl, with spectacles on(just for headache, but I thought that they would give me a nice,geeky feel... hehe) and with long-sleeves salwar-kameez all the time. I was introduced to the world of western fashion by my then-fiance himself. I hardly knew what make-up was too.
E : My husband has sobered down with his shopping attitude, but still loves buying new clothes for me and my kids. As for me, I have completely evolved myself into fashion, and now love wearing make-up and jewellery, according to the ocassion.
Gadgets
M : My husband is a major gizmo freak. I loving call him GG(Gadget Guru). He keeps track of all the latest boy-toys in the market, and keeps fiddling with them. I jokingly say of my husband " He runs on batteries!!". Not true in all cases though..hehe
V : I have a fair knowledge of the current technology, but I dont let it overpower my daily life. I am this simple girl, who would prefer a basic phone to a PDA.
E : Both of us being so much different in this issue, is in itself a balancing act. Thanks to him, we have all the latest gadgets at home, and thanks to me, we don't go completely overboard.
Friends
M : My husband has a very less social circle, in terms of friends. His colleagues are his current friends, and the rapport he shares with everyone is never overboard.He has very less personal friends, and hardly hangs out with anyone of them. The only current passion is his cricket, for which I have no complaints anymore.
V : For me, friends form an integral part of my life. I just can't do without them. I need to be in touch with all my buddies, and it's just a part of my routine. Though I don't get to hang out with my friends, because of my motherhood, I atleast keep myself entertained through phones.
E : Though my husband has very few buddies, we have these parties for my friends, where he joins my group of friends in the most friendly way. I love the way he indulges himself and tries to be one among them. It's one way of showing that he cares for me and my friendship.
Communication
M : My hubby is the typical male, the calmer type. He doesn't speak a lot, atleast as compared to me.
V : I am this non-stop yakkity yak girl, who can actually joke with a total stranger too.
E : The balancing act ?? yeah, I still do the talking and he does the listening part(never know when he dozes off, though... hehe).
Romance
M : He is the typical Capricon male, where you cannot expect running around trees, and proposing a girl with knees on the ground. He is this higly rooted-to-reality type guy, where romance do exists, but maintains that you don't need to remind it every single moment.
V : I am this ultra-filmy girl, highly influenced by movies like DDLJ, and used to also listen for the fictitious guitar strumming. Silly na ? Even now, I would love to express love through flowers, gifts and a simple gesture. I know am expecting it too much, but that's me.
E : Thanks to a friend, I realized that guys aren't totally expressive, atleast as much as I thought. But that doesn't mean that they love us lesser than we do. Its just that guys don't have the Romance cells working as much as the female brain. So, let it be. Atleast, its an achievement that we celebrate our "First kiss day" "First phone day" (on my reminder) too.
These were only some examples about our bitter-sweet relationship. Did I hear someone say "Opposites attract !" ?
A decade of togetherness !
Oct 1st, 1998
A date I will never forget in my entire life. That was the day when my life actually took a U-turn and an entirely new phase began. It was the day I met my dearest husband for the first time.
Well, first impressions first, my best friend, who was by my side during the formal gathering, thought he was FAT ! and indeed he was(he was on the healthier side,...hehe), but I just fell flat for his shining dimples on either cheeks. The charming 22 year old dude in formals was more than I could ask for at that moment. I was just smitten with his brooding sexiness and exuding charm.The first impression was definitely the best one, and nothing else could change it forever.
The next day, when he asked my semi-hitler Dad to actually take me out for some "Quality Time together", everyone in the family were literally shaking with fear at his fearlesness, but I was just even more smitten. Anyway, when dad said "YES", I was half-expecting a "Knight in Shining Armour" riding his horse.... but here he was, driving a Honda, a borrowed one at that too(He wasn't residing in my home-town then, which explains why he had to borrow his friend's vehicle). Well, I wasn't too sure about how he wanted to impress me on that bike, but little did I realize that the journey with my wonderful hubby has started at a slow yet firm pace !
After some random ramblings and people waiting for me to actually turn into a major, 2.5 years just flew. Amidst all those silly fights and sweet-nothings over the phone, we eventually grew together as a couple.
After much waiting, here came the most anticipated day, our wedding day!
10th of May, 2001.
I was this not-so-blushing bride, fully adorned with jewllery and him by my side. I just couldn't be quiet and was chatting non-stop with him even on the wedding platform. Maybe, I couldn't understand why I should try to pretend that am blushing, when I already knew him for about 2.5 years. I was just bedazzled with his French beard and the formal suit he wore. After some 12 hours of non-stop hindu rituals, we were anything but tired. We were literally surprised with the amount of energy both of us possessed despite the gruelling pujas and homams. But, yeah ! I have to mention that I couldn't get over the hangover of the marriage so easily. I still literally could hear the sounds of the "Shehnai" even while travelling in the train.
Post-marriage, we never actually had an official honeymoon, because of my college. However, as a sweet gesture, my in-laws gifted us a honeymoon suite for 3 days at a resort in Hyderabad, where the journey of a "man and woman" actually started.
Since I was still in college, it was decided that I stay with my parents and complete my B.tech. This arrangement worked fine for us, in fact, should say that its the best decision I ever took. I admit that both of us found it very tough staying apart, though we were very much married. There were countless nights where my pillow used to get wet, and when I used to get tempted to leave the whole thing, and just run away to my dearest hubby( who was patiently waiting for my education to be complete). But, I really thank God for letting me have the perseverance and the determination to let me stay apart from him for the sake of my education. It really made a lot of difference to all of us. However, everything has it pros and cons. We really never got time to spend "Quality couple-time" due to my gruelling schedules and constant exams.
And the rest of the story is known to everyone. 2004 marked my entry into motherhood. The same year, I graduated as an engineer as well as a mother. Life was never the same after that. My younger one followed suit, and life just got busier and happier.
Now, as I realize that it's a decade earlier I met my husband, I feel so enthralled at the amount of time. 10 years !! Isnt it a long time for a couple to actually grow into each other, and to actually understand each other, without having to say everything at all times ? Sometimes, its just the eyes which say everything.I keep humming "You say it best when you say nothing at all !" Of course, it will be silly of me if I say that we never fight... but its just that, we are more accustomed to each other's moods and temper.So, even a strong argument just doesn't stay more than is required. But the journey isn't definitely over, and I hope to get to know my husband even better with each passing day.
Love you lots, my jaan ! Happy 10th Anniversary.
A date I will never forget in my entire life. That was the day when my life actually took a U-turn and an entirely new phase began. It was the day I met my dearest husband for the first time.
Well, first impressions first, my best friend, who was by my side during the formal gathering, thought he was FAT ! and indeed he was(he was on the healthier side,...hehe), but I just fell flat for his shining dimples on either cheeks. The charming 22 year old dude in formals was more than I could ask for at that moment. I was just smitten with his brooding sexiness and exuding charm.The first impression was definitely the best one, and nothing else could change it forever.
The next day, when he asked my semi-hitler Dad to actually take me out for some "Quality Time together", everyone in the family were literally shaking with fear at his fearlesness, but I was just even more smitten. Anyway, when dad said "YES", I was half-expecting a "Knight in Shining Armour" riding his horse.... but here he was, driving a Honda, a borrowed one at that too(He wasn't residing in my home-town then, which explains why he had to borrow his friend's vehicle). Well, I wasn't too sure about how he wanted to impress me on that bike, but little did I realize that the journey with my wonderful hubby has started at a slow yet firm pace !
After some random ramblings and people waiting for me to actually turn into a major, 2.5 years just flew. Amidst all those silly fights and sweet-nothings over the phone, we eventually grew together as a couple.
After much waiting, here came the most anticipated day, our wedding day!
10th of May, 2001.
I was this not-so-blushing bride, fully adorned with jewllery and him by my side. I just couldn't be quiet and was chatting non-stop with him even on the wedding platform. Maybe, I couldn't understand why I should try to pretend that am blushing, when I already knew him for about 2.5 years. I was just bedazzled with his French beard and the formal suit he wore. After some 12 hours of non-stop hindu rituals, we were anything but tired. We were literally surprised with the amount of energy both of us possessed despite the gruelling pujas and homams. But, yeah ! I have to mention that I couldn't get over the hangover of the marriage so easily. I still literally could hear the sounds of the "Shehnai" even while travelling in the train.
Post-marriage, we never actually had an official honeymoon, because of my college. However, as a sweet gesture, my in-laws gifted us a honeymoon suite for 3 days at a resort in Hyderabad, where the journey of a "man and woman" actually started.
Since I was still in college, it was decided that I stay with my parents and complete my B.tech. This arrangement worked fine for us, in fact, should say that its the best decision I ever took. I admit that both of us found it very tough staying apart, though we were very much married. There were countless nights where my pillow used to get wet, and when I used to get tempted to leave the whole thing, and just run away to my dearest hubby( who was patiently waiting for my education to be complete). But, I really thank God for letting me have the perseverance and the determination to let me stay apart from him for the sake of my education. It really made a lot of difference to all of us. However, everything has it pros and cons. We really never got time to spend "Quality couple-time" due to my gruelling schedules and constant exams.
And the rest of the story is known to everyone. 2004 marked my entry into motherhood. The same year, I graduated as an engineer as well as a mother. Life was never the same after that. My younger one followed suit, and life just got busier and happier.
Now, as I realize that it's a decade earlier I met my husband, I feel so enthralled at the amount of time. 10 years !! Isnt it a long time for a couple to actually grow into each other, and to actually understand each other, without having to say everything at all times ? Sometimes, its just the eyes which say everything.I keep humming "You say it best when you say nothing at all !" Of course, it will be silly of me if I say that we never fight... but its just that, we are more accustomed to each other's moods and temper.So, even a strong argument just doesn't stay more than is required. But the journey isn't definitely over, and I hope to get to know my husband even better with each passing day.
Love you lots, my jaan ! Happy 10th Anniversary.
This and That !
Blogging has been a great medium to vent my feelings, be it the mommy's highs and lows, or a typical housewife frustration or a wife's love.
I've been trying to put a great deal of enthusiasm on my other blog( http://mylife-as-mommy.blogspot.com!!) with incidents involving my life with my two kids ( one is four years, and the other is 2 ) . But, when I've been trying to actually write my mind's eye too involving posts on my companionship with my husband(for over a decade), I revisited the blog yet again and realized that I better stick to the routine of motherhood, and try not to dilute it. So, I guess it's time I dedicate a whole new blog to let out my inner demons, rather than trying to smudge everything on my mommy's blog. So here I go, my second attempt to blog my feelings. Hope you enjoy the roller-coaster ride of my emotions
I've been trying to put a great deal of enthusiasm on my other blog( http://mylife-as-mommy.blogspot.com!!) with incidents involving my life with my two kids ( one is four years, and the other is 2 ) . But, when I've been trying to actually write my mind's eye too involving posts on my companionship with my husband(for over a decade), I revisited the blog yet again and realized that I better stick to the routine of motherhood, and try not to dilute it. So, I guess it's time I dedicate a whole new blog to let out my inner demons, rather than trying to smudge everything on my mommy's blog. So here I go, my second attempt to blog my feelings. Hope you enjoy the roller-coaster ride of my emotions
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